Dear almost-2 year old child of mine

Dear Sweet Lovable and most times, Adorable little princess of mine,

We’ve had a pretty smooth ride for the most part. In your 22 months on the outside, it’s been good. You sleep fairly well at night, you give great hugs and you are generally a pretty happy little girl. You know I love you to pieces and always will.

Now that we’ve dispense with the pleasantries, let’s you and I discuss a few things about these terrible two’s you seem to be venturing into at mach 5. I get that you’re a strong-willed and determined young lady. After all, you came from determined stock and have seen your parents butt heads on more than one occasion (the term “pig-headed” may or may not have been said under breath…). I also appreciate that you have a free spirit and want to live your life on your terms and explore this great big world you live in.

I get it, I really do. Holding hands with your mom? Lame. Being put in a stroller? That’s for babies, not mature 22 month old women. Denied a third helping at dinner (or any meal for that matter)? Heresy!

So as a fellow sister of stubbornness, I understand your desire for freedom and your absolute insistence on pushing every single boundary imaginable to see how far you can take things. I ask you to do something, you say no and run away. Put you in time-out for beating your brothers with their own mini-sticks and you cry big tears with no remorse. Don’t let you press the button for the conveyor belt at the grocery store and you vocalize your displeasure to the entire checkout line. Ok, I can handle these things. You’re not my first (though you are most assuredly my last) so I’ve danced to this tune a few times over the years.

But if you think for a second you can not get your way and do things such as bite me in the thigh at the airport after 8 long hours of travel and get away with it….think again princess.

Oh yes I will indeed put you in time out in a public and very busy airport (or grocery store, or church or playground…you savvy?). Oh yes I will ignore you as you scream at the top of your lungs and try to make strangers pity you. And oh yes I will make you sit in that time out spot for every last second of your punishment no matter how much you beg and scream for freedom.

Remember child, you’re only half my DNA which means you only got half my stubbornness. Don’t mess with the Queen. The Queen always wins.

So the next time you try to exert your freewill, let’s just remember that time in the airport when you got a time out for biting your mama in the thigh like she was Thanksgiving dinner mmmmmmkay?


Your hangry mom who is currently experiencing an epic caffeine crash because you wake me up at ungodly hours of the morning.