Running Toward: Newness

Oh September, you sly fox…how did you sneak into our lives so suddenly???

So…I guess it’s fall now. I guess it’s time to make some pumpkin spice and prepare for the onslaught of fallness. School bus schedules, packing lunches, dropping kids off, picking them up, praying the kids you wake up with in the morning are the same ones you tuck into bed at night.

But another “fall” phenomenon will soon be upon us:

Routine.

I am ready for routine. My kids are ready for routine. Summer is wonderful and it’s so great to be able to exhale from checking your calendar daily to make sure everyone is where they need to be but it will also be nice to know where we need to go. I am not a spontaneous planning person so more often than not, we end up not doing a whole heck of a lot in our day which at times makes me feel guilty for wasting their precious moments at home with me. It’s guilt I don’t want to welcome into my life but alas…there it is. And by this time of the summer, it is often accompanied with some regret.

We had a great summer but I always wonder if maybe we’re not doing enough. I find myself often saying “next year, we’ll have more freedom”, “next year, they’ll be old enough to…”, “next year we won’t have to worry about…” Until next year hits and we start the next round of “next year’s”. It’s a vicious cycle that I would really love to escape from.

It is true that our kids are at challenging ages. It seems when you have 6, 4 and nearly 2 (which reminds me…I need to plan a birthday party…crap!) year olds, the age gap seems astronomical and my ability to split 3 ways is as likely as my ability to split 2 ways was.

So as we head into this new season, I’m doing my best to bury those regrets, those “maybe we should have’s” or “next year’s” and trying hard to focus on what we can do now in the moments that are before us. We have a lot of change to navigate this year and my hope is that we can approach it all with grace, patience and joy and not worry about the tomorrow’s that haven’t arrived yet.

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